I woke up fine today.
I made the bed. I made that call.
I thought maybe I had turned a corner.
Thought maybe that was all.

Then Tuesday hit me like a wall.

No warning. No reason. No note left behind.
Just the weight back in my chest
and the fog back in my mind.
And that version of me from yesterday?
Impossible to find.

This is the part nobody gets.
They see the good day and they think you're through.
They say, "You seemed so well last week!"
Yeah. I know. I thought so too!

It does not work like weather.
It does not work like math.
I cannot see the canyon
until I'm off the path.

One day the lights are on.
One day the lights are gone.
And I am standing in the middle
trying to hold on
trying to explain
that both of these are true
that I was fine on Friday
and I am not fine now
and I am not lying either time
I just don't know how
to live inside a life
that flips without a sound.

Good day.
Bad day.
Good day.
Down.

Good day.
Bad day.
Good day.
Round.

Over and over and over until
I forget which version is real,
the one who made the bed this morning
or the one who cannot feel.